A seed to a sapling
A couple of days ago I came across an interesting book. The book depicted life in a very odd manner, it discredited it. It painted highlighted activities, values and ideals that we so desperately pursue in life as mundane and unnecessary. Honestly speaking, it felt like a slap on the face. But you know what it did? It made something deep inside my mess of a brain click. It made me realise that I’ve been going about it all wrong.
So before I go into the whole epiphany I managed to have. Let me first talk about the book that so graciously brought upon this epiphany. This book is called “ You are dying and your world is a lie.” by Johnny B. Traunt. Just the name is provocative as hell if you ask me. But its nothing that is far from the truth, that I can assure you. The book goes on about how throughout life the most desirable thing is time and unfortunately something that we, even with our current advances, will never have even the slightest grasp off. Additionally, life, as we know it, is brittle. You could be full of life one day and bone dead dry the next. Not exactly a predictable journey. But that’s out of our hand almost completely, but what isn’t is what we do with the time we have now. The gist is that tomorrow’s dilemma is today’s highlight. Which means technically speaking you never actually lived your today because you were too busy living for tomorrow. The book challenges individuals to push your limits and take on internal fears each day so that you are actually able to feel something and live for today. Obviously it provides a cautious warning in regards to not doing anything that would be the epitome of stupidity. But it does provide fundamental insights that you’ve gotta feel to live. And you feel by being challenged. You will never feel challenged if you plan it for tomorrow. Its a step by step process, where you gotta feel every step or else that is time wasted. Time you will never ever get back.
It’s been difficult recently. Not world hunger difficult, but difficult. I was struggling because my plan for my future was falling apart piece by piece. I felt like I had no solid ground to stand on. But I realised something. Why was it falling apart in the first place? Mainly because I was afraid that my ‘full-proof’ plans of the future, if not achieved, would be a let down and a level of disappointment of anyone who believed in me. Which led me to thinking: who and what was I doing any of this for? If my time was genuinely limited and the probability of waking up tomorrow alive was never going to be a 100% then why, oh why, am I so desperate to keep a facade of ambitions for people other than myself. Now, don’t get me wrong, I will forever be grateful for any contribution from anyone who has been such a dear part of my life. I will forever love, respect and cherish their presence. But it has come to my attention that this is my life. This is my journey, my path, my future and my happiness.
I’ll figure it out. It might not be the one that was depicted by everyone else, but I can guarantee you this much: it will be the one that I will look forward to everyday to the point that tomorrow’s relevance will be minimal to today’s.
Breathe…
Tomorrow is a whole day away, at least we’ve got today.
